Adjective:  Knackered.  Informal.  British.

Extremely tired “you look absolutely knackered

Worn out or damaged by overuse “a knackered CD player”

 

It is fair to say that throughout your journey, you will fairly reliably feel knackered for a lot of the time.

 

Even before you start treatment, the bombardment of information you have to take in, and the number of pre-treatment appointments you have to attend (often quite a long commute from your home) is just exhausting.

 

Once treatment starts, you’ll get that 2 or 3 days of post-chemo, steroid induced wakefulness, but you will still feel a bit “outside of yourself”. I used to feel like I had a permanent hangover, without the fun of the night before.

 

Then after that first couple of days you’ll have your “crash” where it really does feel a bit like you are in a dream (and not a very pleasant one.  George Clooney didn’t surface once for me).  Everyone reacts differently and a lot will depend on you, what chemo you are having, how long you’re having it for, how much they are giving you and what other health/personal issues you have to contend with.

 

I found that if I just expected to be dog tired the whole time, it was a bonus when I felt OK.

 

I was lucky enough (if anything to do with The Cancer can be described as “lucky”) to be starting my treatment in the Summer, so I was able to spend a lot of time outside in the garden.  I don’t know why, but feeling like an inanimate blob just feels better if you can feel the sun warming your bones.  Although you have to stay out of the sun (another bloody chemo side effect!!!)

 

Keep your diary as free as you can, but also have treat ideas in your back pocket that you can pull out at short notice to make the most of the good days.